Sex is an integral and wildly important part of almost every relationship. Whether it be a short term fling, or a marriage that endures decades. It seems that while the discussion of sexual dysfunction in relationships is relegated to the round robin of girlfriends sharing coffee, or in the stuff and stark office of a sex therapist, it’s rare that couples ever get a real glimpse into what sex really is.
And what is sex really? Well- it’s a myriad of things. It’s about emotional intimacy just as much as it is about the physical. It’s about passion and intrigue. Interest and confidence. Sex can encourage couples to explore one another’s minds while at the same time, exploring each other’s bodies. So why do we continue to discuss is lazily with friends, or clinically with psychiatric professionals? If we’re tired of the hum drum standard approach to sex in our relationships, why do we seek out the same hum drum solutions?
Changing the Face of Sex Therapy
One adult film star and entrepreneur has asked herself this very question. An expert in her field, Rachel Starr’s porn is popular all over the internet. She’s not only someone who gets paid to have sex, but also to turn people on that she’s never met. And she’s pretty fantastic at it. Her repertoire of movies and awards stretches almost throughout the entirety of her 11+ years of career porn. She has been employed by many of the top names in the industry, but hopes to take this venture to little known bedrooms around the world.
While Hollywood continues to strive to bring couples the unattainable dreams of having wild, raunchy, and passionate relationships, maintained for years, the reality is quite different. Even when done perfectly right, sex throughout a relationships timeline can become stale, awkward, and even disappointing.
“Despite being absolutely comfortable with your significant other, many couples still struggle to be completely candid with one another when it comes to desire.” Says Sara Dee. A more traditional freelance sex therapist. When it comes to physical intimacy, it can be extremely difficult for long term couples to openly discuss their more deviant thoughts. “Our lives get in the way. Kids, careers, physical changes associated with aging- they are all distractions. They can severely diminish personal confidence, which has an incredibly harsh effect on sexuality.”
Being comfortable with yourself, your significant other, and your therapist is the best way to be able to troubleshoot.
Bringing it Home
On her website, Rachel Starr describes her coaching as a way to gain confidence in the bedroom and feel sexier. “Her knowledge has put her at the top. Let her share her wisdom with you so you can skip the hiccups of trial and error.” Her website charges $200 for an hour of video chat with the celebrity. This gives couples the ability to really discuss what they want to achieve and start a plan with how to go about it. Additional appointments are also available, should more questions crop up later.
Being able to discuss your sexual queries with an experienced professional pornstar can help relieve the pressure and stigma associated with visiting a traditional therapist. Rachel is casual incarnate. You can get a feel for her positivity and relatable nature from checking out her podcast on YouTube. Rachel has a bubbly and inviting personality that shines through both in her vlog style chats as well as in her films.
Even if you’re not a fan of pornography, you can learn a thing or two from the pros in the comfort of your own home. Finding a balance between what works, and what works for you. Taking your relationship to the next level and spicing up the bedroom.